Empty...

"Rishtey, Bharose, Chahat, Yakeen
Un sab ka daaman ab chaak hai
Samjhe the haathon mein hai zameen
Muththi jo khuli sab khaak hai....

Dil mein yeh shor hai kyun...?
Imaan kamzor hai kyun...?
Nazuk yeh dor hai kyun??? "

A special Thank you note..

"i'm so tired that i can't sleep
standing on the edge of something much too deep
it's funny how i feel so much yet cannot say a word
we are screaming inside oh we can't be heard
don't let your life pass you by
weep not for the memories...................."
(Sarah Mclachan, I will remember you)

Can't thank you enough
for the cruel betrayal
I cannot ever trust anyone again
Can't thank you enough
for all the beautiful pain
the tears simply refuse to die down
Thank you so much
for shattering my beliefs
about any kind of goodness in the world
Can't thank you enough
for all the sleepless nights
and the turbulent days

I genuinely can't thank you enough
Coz of all that I went through
I rediscovered myself..
"Weep not for the memories...."
Its just not worth it...
It never was..

I wish I could someday understand how and why people derive pleasure by ruthlessly betraying someone... Maybe the answer isn't important! Coz Life comes a full circle. What you sow is what you reap!! ;)

Reflecting Upon......

"I do not wish to treat relationships daintily, but
with the roughest courage. When they are real, they
are not glass threads or frost-work, but the solidest
thing we know."

"Be not the slave of your past. Plunge into the sublime seas, dive deep and swim far, so you shall come back with self-respect, with new power, with an advanced experience that shall explain and overlook the old."

"It is easy in the world to live after the world's opinion; it is easy in solitude to live after our own; but the great man is he who in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude."

(My fav quotes by Ralph Waldo Emerson)

At War...with the Self !

The battlelines had been clearly drawn..The Enemy was prepared for an intensive onslaught.. I, alone was pitted against an army of human and inhuman forces.. Stepped onto the battlefield suffering from a gallimaufry of emotions. The familiar nervousness , the expected mental strain and many a doubts...
It was still time for the official kick-off... Desperately needed this crucial spell to myself..Took a few deep breaths..I knew they wouldnt do any good to pacify the turmoil within..Nevertheless, it somewhat cleared the dust n grime..
Gradually lifted my gaze to match it with my opponents..Its one thing to know who you would encounter and another to actually face them on the war ground. Quivering and trembling, I scanned each and every one. They were all present..My insecurities..my failures n foibles..the deep-seated complexes dint miss the opportunity to come to fore..even the fears set out to take revenge..the ghosts of the dreams that had been strangled with my own hands sprung up today..Most tragic was the sight of those people I had loved more than myself..they had betrayed me before, laid bruises neither time nor love could heal.. Life was offering a legitimate chance to give back the grief.. (little did life know about the ways of love..it ultimately gets down to tormenting oneself)
Glanced back for my allies in the war..It was just me! My shadow, too, stood across the borderline. Pain was the only weapon I carried..(to be continued...)

"The secret art of war and love is to know when to give up and move on."

For the sake of Individuality..

If I ain't what others be,
they arent what's - ME!!